In my 36th year, we found out that it was a miracle that I conceived a couple years before, as the test results showed that Rusty, possibly as a result of medication he had to take, had male factor infertility. This was hard news for both of us and we processed in different ways the … Continue reading 6. Diagnosis
Month: April 2018
5. ??
(Trust me this will make more sense in a few entries. For now, just know that the italicized entries are from a different perspective.) During Alex's 34th year: The little one and the tiny bit littler one looked at each other and smiled. They didn't have eyes, but they could see. Sometimes their vision was … Continue reading 5. ??
Rusty’s 1st Bee Story – Part 3
Trying hard not to scratch Rusty returned to his room, finished changing and snuck into the back of the chapel a little late. Rus waved him over to a spot of pew he had saved. “Did you get help? Your face looks a lot worse.” Rusty felt at his now lumpy face and nodded. “She … Continue reading Rusty’s 1st Bee Story – Part 3
4. … Dashed
So here is the thing. That "protecting" I was talking about? It didn't work. Before I even got to a doctor, I miscarried. A high and then a low. Many of you know what that feels like. On top of that disappointment of the loss, I felt embarrassed about having told so quickly. Feeling alone … Continue reading 4. … Dashed
3. Hope …
Two years had passed since my husband and I married, and still no pregnancy. We were busy traveling here and there with work and studying, so didn't have a lot of time to think about it. And besides I had a dream about having a baby in my 34th year and that hadn't ended yet. … Continue reading 3. Hope …
Rusty’s 1st Bee Story – Part 2
Now I'm still not sure if it was because the admissions office had had a weird sense of humour, were assigning bunks by alphabetical order, or just coincidence. However, three of the four people in the room either shared names or had very similar names. We had decided to refer to ourselves as Rus, Rusty, … Continue reading Rusty’s 1st Bee Story – Part 2
2. Looking Back
Before we go forward in this story, I think it would be beneficial to look back... For as long as I can remember I have loved babies. Even as a child, I volunteered in the church nursery just to be around them. I would day dream of finding and caring for abandoned babies in the … Continue reading 2. Looking Back
1. Spectator
“I'm so happy for you!” If there was a polar opposite of happy, that was how I was feeling. “What a joyous occasion!” Though for me, only in the sense that joy isn't always felt and can exist in any tortuous circumstance. “It was a surprise was it? You thought your family was as big … Continue reading 1. Spectator
Rusty’s 1st Bee Story – Part 1
“Hey Rusty, why is your hand the size of a softball?” “Let me tell you the story.” --- Rusty, a 16 year old boy, was waiting in the cafeteria line. It was a beautiful summer day and half way through a week long camp for teens interested in learning more about loving God and loving … Continue reading Rusty’s 1st Bee Story – Part 1
